Thursday, September 27, 2012

5MinFri - Grasp

Where a beautiful crowd spends five minutes all writing on the same topic and then sharing ‘em over at Gypsy Mama's blog.  Want to know how Five Minute Friday got started and how to participate? All the details are here.

Sometimes (like right now in life) I feel like things are slipping through my fingers. I'm just barely making it and losing my grasp on life. This is tough for me as a closet control freak. On the surface, you might see my pile of dirty dishes, messy house and unbathed 2 year old and think "Wow, she just doesn't care." But the opposite is true. I see these things and it overwhelms me. The problem is that in addition to being a mom and homemaker, I find myself agreeing to everything people ask me to do. There just aren't enough hours in a day to do it all and until I can get that truth into my heart I'll be feeling like I'm losing my grasp for awhile.


Until next time,

Sunday, September 23, 2012

The Way I Imagine the Conversation

My body: "I've been so good to you why are you depriving me of oxygen? I haven't even pointed out the extra pounds you've put on these last few months!"

Me: "I'm so sorry, it's not my fault! The baby seems to be comfortable leaning right against my lungs. I'd give you more oxygen if I could, I swear!"

Sunday, September 16, 2012


Being pregnant and raising a toddler are a difficult combination. Today alone I've managed to allow my own frustrations to be an excuse for yelling at him for doing something I fully expected, for touching something that normally wouldn't have bothered me, and for not telling me in time that he needed to use the toilet. Days like today make me feel like such a failure, especially when he still looks up at me and smiles as if I'm the best mom in the world. Ugh, I just realized that we've done very little new content from my homeschool curriculum, meaning I'm going to quickly fall behind if I don't pull it together quickly.

How do other parents deal with days like this?

Until next time!


Thursday, September 13, 2012

Big Bites

As I prepare for an upcoming retreat that I agreed to speak at, I'm feeling as though I've bitten off more than I can chew.

God, only You truly know why I was asked to be there. I trust that You will shine in spite of my insecurities and that what is left of this planning process will run smoothly. Please give me peace and ease my feelings of loneliness so that I can present Your Son with the spirit that He deserves!

Until next time!

Monday, September 3, 2012

Dear ChocolateChip - 24 Months (Happy Birthday!)

"For me it feels like yesterday, just yesterday to me I looked into your tiny face, your tiny face held me Of course I know all children grow
All children grow of course I know.....
I didn’t know how fast you’d grow"

Somehow, two years have flown by me in the blink of an eye. You have grown so much from the baby that your Papa and I brought home from the hospital. Your personality has grown and bloomed so much that some days we feel like we don't know you at all. 

Someone asked recently what things you are "in to" so that they could buy you a birthday gift and as I wrote out a list, I was surprised at how long and all over the place the list seemed. You love things like "Baby Signing Time" and just about anything musical for that matter, have recently discovered PBS shows like Barney, Sid the Science Kid and Word World, and you do regular costume changes between Buzz Lightyear and Woody of Toy Story and Spiderman. 

You frustrate your Papa and I less than half a much as you make us laugh, so we think those "terrible twos" should be manageable (I guess we'll revisit that theory in 12 months.)

Things I hope to never forget: No favorite colors as you still can't identify them, but you can count in Spanish up to 3 and you make a decent attempt at singing the alphabet. You love Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star and the Happy Birthday song, and will spontaneously break out in song throughout the day.  We read together and play together and spend lots of time together and I wouldn't have it any other way. You give the best hugs and kisses but only on your own schedule. Some mornings you want hugs over and over, other times Papa and I can beg for hugs and kisses and you yell "No" and run away laughing. 

With baby number 2 coming soon I'm trying to make sure you get lots of attention and know how much we love you. We try to show you babies and how delicate they are and have practiced with dolls, but we won't know how you'll react until baby arrives. I know you'll be an awesome big brother though since you really seem to care for people in general.

I look forward to the years to come as your mom. I love you baby boy!

Love always, Mama

Saturday, September 1, 2012

Sick Baby

Sadly, my husband and I had a cranky baby on our hands today. Unfortunately for hubs, he had to deal with the brunt of the crankiness. At some point we figured that he might be coming down with something and would treat him as we figured out what was wrong. In the late evening I thought he felt warm and an hour later the thermometer confirmed his temperature was 101 degrees. A quick check on my favorite fever reference chart confirmed that 101 is still mild enough at his age 3 days until he's a 2 year old!) for me not to worry too much. About an hour after that his temp had risen to 102.5. He was laying down pretty calmly watching PBS Kids and it was already late so I decided to continue letting his body do whatever it was doing.
It's now just after 5:30am and I was awake with ChocolateChip for almost 2 hours (he fell asleep as I'm typing this next to him.) He's wasn't cranky or crying but not lethargic or delirious either. Just couldn't seem to sleep. He would close his eyes and appear to be resting but then he would speak and I would know he was still awake (it wasn't like talking in your sleep, it would be like a request for his stuffed dog or telling me a bug bite itches or asking for a hug). He's still warm to the touch but wouldn't let me take his temperature (now that he's asleep I can try again though.) Not sure what to make of it, but I figured this is as good a place as any to document this.

Thanks for listening. Until next time!